Marriage Protection – You Have A Responsibility To Protect Yours (Part 1 of 2)

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It is a relatively easy decision to insure our properties and other assets in life. In a short space of time, we would have made decisions on which company to source services to install our electric fence, CCTV, alarms; provide insurance and health cover. 

Marriage Protection – You Have A Responsibility To Protect Yours (Part 1 of 2)
But why do people, who have all these expensive insurances; still find themselves separated or divorced from their marriage spouses? Do they ever think of protecting their marriage institutions? What can people do to try and protect their marriages?

1. Don't be naive. Most people who end up in affairs don't set out to have one. Infidelity usually begins with an innocent relationship that, in time, moves to an emotional depth that crosses a line of fidelity.

2. Increase your investment at home. Solid marriages are built by spending time together, laughing together, and playing together. If you aren't dating your mate, set up dates for the coming months and make spending time together a priority.

3. Make sure your social network is supportive of your marriage. Surround yourself with friends who are happily married and who don't believe in fooling around.

4. Become aware of your choices. The choices we make every day dictate the life we lead. To thine own self be true! In other words, how we handle the small things dictates how we react to the bigger ones.

5. Realize the power of your eyes. As it has been said, your eyes are the windows to your soul. Pull the shades down if you sense someone is pausing a little too long in front of your windows. I realize that good eye contact is necessary for effective conversation, but there's a deep type of look that must be reserved for your spouse.

6. Don't play the comparison game. We all make mistakes, have bad habits and annoying behaviours. But when we compare a new friend to our spouse, it's an unfair comparison because we aren't seeing that person in their home, taking care of kids at 3 am, or struggling to make ends meet.

7. Know your boundaries. Put fences around your heart and protect sacred ground, reserved only for your spouse. Many married people don't understand that a chemical reaction can occur with someone other than their mates – a reaction of two hearts, the chemistry of two souls. This is emotional adultery – an intimacy with the opposite sex outside of marriage. Emotional adultery is unfaithfulness of the heart. When two people begin talking of intimate struggles, doubts or feelings, they may be sharing their souls in a way that God intended exclusively for the marriage relationship. Emotional adultery is friendship with the opposite sex that has progressed too far.

8. Whenever you're faced with the temptation of attraction to someone other than your spouse, realize that there is only one response that will work – TO FLEE! Any other approach, such as trying to rationalize your way out of it, is doomed to failure. Decide to run from the situation as from a contagious disease.
Marriage Protection – You Have A Responsibility To Protect Yours (Part 1 of 2)

9. Quit kidding yourself. Understand the tremendous capacity of every human being to deceive him or herself when not connected to God. Know that, once you start making excuses for wrong behavior, each excuse will sound more plausible, and you will sink deeper and deeper into sin and ruin. Admit that you can't trust your own self.

10. Avoid Temptation. Innocent chat room visits can endanger a marriage when someone discovers a ‘Cyberspace soul mate’. When the honesty that's missing in a marriage gets spilled out on the computer screen, emotional affairs can result. Preventative measures include:

## Avoid discussing emotional topics or personal problems over the Internet.
## Avoid chat rooms and Internet sites designed for meeting people and socializing.
## If necessary, limit your time on-line. If you are sharing emotional closeness with someone of the opposite sex other than your spouse in any arena, STOP!

May God help you to protect our holy matrimony.

Tapiwa Zuze
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